"The thought of suicide is a great consolation: by means of it one gets through many a dark night."
Nietzsche
I have touched on the themes I wish to
write about here many times, to the point of exhaustion perhaps? I
just feel the need to try and, I don't know, work through them again, in a way.
Some personal details: I am 66 years
old and an English, white male. Yes, I fall into many of the
'non-person' categories in our enlightened times.
I was raised in a very small and very
rural village in Lincolnshire, England, in the 1950s and 1960s. And I realise
that I am looking back to those times with rose-tinted spectacles of
nostalgia and sentimentally. My family for many generations were
rural working class, but my father was a long-distance lorry driver
in the days when 'long-distance' meant, for example, Glasgow
or London, not Berlin or Warsaw.
I passed the 11+ examination in 1964, only the
second person in my family to do so, went to Grammar School, 1964 to
1971, and to the University of Essex, 1974 to 1979. I graduated in
1977 with an Upper-Second BA in Sociology. I don't feel the need to
defend Sociology as, in those days, it was a very different field to
the utter rubbish most of it has become today. To me, the word 'Sociology' has come to mean utter nonsensical 'woke' drivel. However, to be fair, that is mainly in the English speaking world. But, even in
my time at University, the first tendrils of the coming post-modern
storm of ordure was just visible on the horizon.
I also did post-graduate research
after graduation into historical and social structures.
Marxism was present
at Essex, of course, but mostly the 'soft'
form that was based on the Economic
and Philosophic Manuscripts of
1844. For a while I was a serious revolutionary Marxist myself, and
then a social anarchist, and then an anarchist of sorts.
But, in my time at University, minds weren't closed, a genuine 'Market place of ideas'
existed and the importance of empirical evidence, i.e., reality, was
taken for granted. A reasoned argument for a point of view was also
expected, not just asserted. Even my Marxist colleagues and I would argue in a rational manner using empirical data. I slowly came to realise, however, that the data was often selectively used and 'interpreted' in particular ways.
Anyway, I have a
sort of fantasy home, one that I can never return to. It is a small
rural village set in rolling fields of crops. Small fields too, with
thick hedgerows dividing them up. It is, of course, hot and sunny
with a clear blue sky. There is a long country lane, with grass
growing down the middle. The verges and hedgerows are wild and
overgrown. There is a smell of grass and vegetation in the air and
birds singing in the hedgerows. I am cycling down this road,
ecstatically happy, looking forward to my tea, baked beans on toast
probably.
So many smells,
sounds and sights take me back to that home. But I can never return
of course. I know, the frailties of human memory and the strong
tendency to remember the good times, but nevertheless, that is, if you
like, the 'fantasy'
home I yearn for.
After University was over I got
married but had no children, and I feel great regret and sadness
over that. I taught, both Sociology and Psychology for many years,
and some History. For a while, I had a civilian job with the police to
help boost my income. That was interesting and all of the officers I
knew at that time would be appalled at what the police force has
become these days. All of them I knew at that time must be retired, or even
dead, by now.
I slipped into a fairly routine life
of work and home. My politics also became very conventional. I
supported the Labour Party but, at that time, it was a very different
party to what it is today.
When Blair became the leader I began to
distanced myself from the party.
As I said above, I went through an
anarchist phase and that never really died in me. I am fairly well-read in history and philosophy and the lessons and arguments from
those fields have always maintained in me a deep devotion to absolute
liberty. My time at University, and a growing interest in science,
also deepened my commitment to empirical evidence.
Logic and reason have always been
important to me too. I became an atheist in my teenage years, and I
still am. I know this is disliked, even hated, and misunderstood by
many people I otherwise agree with, but that's the way it is, sorry.
I had, I believe, a commitment all
through my adult years to liberty, reality and reason and, for most
of that time, most of the left actually had a similar commitment.
I turned back to a philosopher I had
always admired, J. S. Mill, and began to move towards a Classical
Liberal position. Mill was quite popular with the left in my University days by the way, when they cared about free expression. Then I discovered Ayn Rand, Max Stirner and the
Austrian School amongst others. These had a profound impact on my thinking.
I found myself disagreeing more and
more with the left and agreeing more and more with people I would
once have argued against. I think the Overton Window was moving more
and more to the left after about the year 2000, but my position
basically remained the same, so I found myself moving, ipso facto,
more to the right.
Today, I am in despair. The values that
I, basically, stood for all my life are being destroyed, derided and
corrupted. We are a few steps away from a genuinely totalitarian
society. The values that built the greatest civilisation in history
are being chipped away, well, more like, jackhammered away. The
people doing this and the networks of power that support them do not
know what kind of society they are creating, and I hope that they
enjoy it.
There is a sliver of hope I think.
There exist many pockets of 'resistance' and the left will,
eventually, eat itself. There are signs of that already. But what
destruction will be caused in this process?
I think there is hope, too, outside
the Islamo-'Woke' nightmare that is developing in these times. I still believe that those responsible for
this are a tiny minority with very loud voices, and the squeaky wheel
gets the grease of course, or as we say over here, empty vessels make the most noise. And I believe that the majority of 'ordinary'
people find these developments amusing and largely irrelevant.
Ordinary, decent, people have to use time and energy living their
lives and to follow their dreams of homes, children, holidays, material goods and whatever else they desire. Those that dwell in the 'woke' bubble have no
conception whatsoever of the day to day lives of ordinary folk and fail to see
just how much their lives, those in the bubble, are dependent on the efforts of the working classes.
These trends have also been magnified
by social media and the sheer speed that bad ideas and utter
ignorance can be spread. I would also argue that social media has
created a space that encourages quick responses that are not thought
through and with a childlike focus on 'feelings'.
I will not excuse myself, either, from being too emotional at times and being too quick to post items that are not totally the truth. I feel ashamed about that and try to control my more basic reactions.
I have written elsewhere on the phenomenon, the 'monsters of the id' have been released.
I am also particularly sad about:
- The utter ignorance and disrespect that is shown to the many 1,000's of people, both famous and unknown, who gave their time, energy, resources and sometimes their lives to creating Western Civilisation. Yes, they all had feet of clay but, who doesn't? We are all human and we all have the imperfections of human nature. The sheer childish manner in which the crudest form of black and white thinking is used here makes me truly, truly despair.
- The unbelievable depth of ignorance of 'the woke'. It is fractal ignorance, no matter how far down you go there is even more ignorance. The lack of knowledge of the details and subtleties of history, philosophy, literature, art, music, literature and even science makes me very sad indeed. The education system in the West appears to be dead.
What worries me very much is how the
social media giants have also become 'woke' and are aiding the movement toward totalitarianism, how much power the big IT corporations now wield.
I realise this is a sketch and a bit thin, but I could deepen many of the points I make here.
But all these developments have
created in me such feelings of despair, loss, disappointment and,
yes, anger. Everything I believed in and argued for over most of my adult life is being simply thrown away. I really don't care much anymore, and am pleased that I am the age I am.
As I said, I am 66 years old. I could
live another 20 years or so if I am lucky. Well, I say 'lucky',
but given the way the world is moving, I don't know if lucky is the
right word here.
I will admit to being afraid of the
future, partly because I am an old, white, gammon male with the wrong opinions and beliefs about .. so damn much.
Maybe I am too pessimistic? Maybe this period will pass? Maybe the 'woke' will begin to see the issues and problems with their viewpoint? Maybe they will grow up? Maybe the next generation will reject the 'woke' ideologies? Maybe people will simply have had enough? It is very possible that this will happen, it has happened before. But, as I said, what damage will be done before then?
Si vis pacem, para bellum
¤
Islam delenda est